Bertoletti captures 'world grits' title

The top seven eaters split $10,000 in prize money.

BOSSIER CITY, La. (AP) — Yankees beat out Southerners for the top spots in what was billed as the first World Grits Eating Championship at Louisiana Downs on Saturday.

Pat Bertoletti, a mohawk-sporting chef from Chicago, gulped down 21 pounds of buttery, goopy blandness in 10 minutes to win $4,000.

Bertoletti, in a statement, said the competition "tested our stomach capacity like no other."

The grits were presented in 2-pound trays, each about 8 inches by 6 inches and 1½ inches deep, said Ryan Nerz, a spokesman for Major League Eating. He said he half expected to see Bertoletti, one of the top gobblers on the competitive eating circuit, topple over.

The buzz going in was that a lot of grits would go down because they are so easy to eat, Nerz said. There were nine contestants, and the top three ate 60 pounds.

Tim "Eater X" Janus of New York was second, with 20 pounds. Joey Chestnut of San Jose, Calif., who this summer ate a record-breaking 66 hot dogs in 12 minutes to become world hot dog-eating champion, finished third, polishing off 19 pounds.

Sonya Thomas of Alexandria, Va. was fourth at 18½ pounds, Hall Hunt of Jacksonville, Fla., fifth at 15 pounds, and Patrick Van Dam of Dallas sixth at 13½ pounds.

Van Dam "was sort of a surprise. ... I think he probably weighed 130 pounds," Nerz said.

Grainy grits — dried, ground corn that is then cooked back into mush or the soupy consistency used for the championship — are a Southern staple. They are often eaten for breakfast with butter or even sugar; sometimes chilled and then fried in slices; and, for more substantial meals, fortified with stronger-tasting foods such as cheese, bacon, shrimp.

This is believed to be the first year the food has made the Major League Eating circuit, Nerz said, and it had "firmly established" its place among top-flight competitive eaters.

He estimated several hundred people showed up to watch.

The biggest contestant — one of the track's more usual contestants — finished last.

"A horse named Big Mo started eating grits, but quickly decided it wasn't his flavor," Nerz said.

Copyright 2007 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

No Sex Toys on the Corporate Card Please

Nothing shocks us anymore. Or so we thought, until news of a woman expensing a vibrator hit the web this week.

Many employees abuse their expense accounts this is a fact. There have been stories of a 3 year-old’s $20,000 birthday party and a $5,000 casket for a relative’s funeral paid for with company money. Headlines noting the too common tale of executives expensing strippers don’t surprise most of us—even Barron’s, a corporate cousin of FiLife, has made the headlines.

We’ve heard the outlandish explanations of some of these purchases before: Strippers make clients happy, and when clients are happy they are more likely to part with their money. But a vibrator? How do you explain that one? She must have really needed it. She must have also really needed to expense her electricity bills, phone bills, an iPod, jewelry, and her credit-card payments.

Her inflated report probably set off alarm bells, but don’t fall into the trap of thinking that you can get away with something more subtle. According to the American Express 2006 Expense Management Benchmark Survey, about two-thirds of the 250 companies polled said that they were looking at expense reports more carefully than in past years. Padding can result in job terminations, fines, legal action and, of course, you’ll probably have to pay the money back (the vibrator chick owed $15,000 for her myriad of purchases).

Every company’s policy is different, so if you’re not sure about a purchase, ask your boss. But vibrators are not part of the deal, even if they make you perform better at work.

In case this is confusing for anyone, the rules here are fairly simple: Expense accounts are for job-related expenses only, like taking a client to lunch or paying for a plane ticket when you need to travel for work. Sometimes you can expense business clothing or charge books for research.